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This morning I was feeling very good, happy. But I do most mornings. Even on stimmy days I try to pray and praise myself into a better mood. At the very least I try to smile.

A co-worker commented on my attitude today. She said I am always happy. They are always asking why I am so happy especially with all the difficult things going on in the office. Everyone is always so stressed and upset, but they say I am never stressed or upset.

From that, they conclude that that is because I don’t have it as hard as they do.

I smile. I have it worse.

See, not only am I dealing with the issues in the office, I have been told by a key figure that I am bad. I still work just as hard, though. I am also nice to the person when I see her.

However, add to that situation the fact that I have a cognitive disability that makes it very difficult to “read” people, to understand them, to grasp their moods, expressions, meanings behind words. I can’t tell if they are being nice to me because they like me or if they really don’t like me but tolerate me. I can’t tell if they wish I would go away or if they don’t mind (or even like) me being around.

I don’t even know if I am wanted there and they all might as well speak another language.

I suspect, based on what the “key person” said that they really don’t want me around.

But still I work (as if I am working for God) and do my best. I try to have a good, helpful attitude and I try to be cheerful.

My co-workers are very surprised to hear that I have struggles at work, the same as they have.

They ask me how I stay positive and how I keep from getting stressed and upset.

I told them that my focus is on Jesus, not on this job or the people here. I know that no matter what happens, God and only God is in control of my future, my destiny, my life. These people can’t touch me. Even if I lost my job tomorrow I know that God will take care of me.

I turn on my praise music when I leave the house in the morning and keep it on throughout my entire hour long commute. Then I play it in my office much of the day. It keeps me positive. It keeps me happy.

It keeps my focus where it belongs.

My praise song playlist:

 

  • “Get Ready for Revival”                    Bethany Church
  • “Freedom”                                      Eddie James
  • “Great God”                                    Free Chapel
  • “This is how we Overcome”              Hillsong
  • “Friend of God”                               Don’t know the artist
  • “Favor of the Lord”                          Israel & New Breed (lots of repetition here and I repeat it out loud
  •                                                                 Nothing can stop the favor of the Lord – unstoppable” Try it, it
  •                                                                  really works)
  • “God is Great”                                 Hillsong
  • “Trading my Sorrows”                      Israel & New Breed
  • “My Life is in You Lord”                    Don’t know the artist
  • “Everyone (Praises)                          Desperation Band
  • “Counting on God”                           New Life Worship (one of my favorites!)
  • “Born Again”                                   Newsboys

I also made this. Try it. Let me know what you think.

Wheres Your Focus

 

So, where is your focus today?

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